Tobi's Room
by Akasuna no Rin
Summary: Deidara is new to the Akatsuki. He doesn't know the dangers hidden in Tobi's room... Not TobiDeidara.


The blond missing nin sat in a chair in the Akatsuki main room. All of the rest of the Akatsuki were there except the leader, and Tobi. And Zetsu. But who knows what he was doing. The leader was probably doing something important, though Deidara had no clue what Tobi was doing. Deidara was new to the Akatsuki, and the boy in the swirly orange mask confused him. All of the rest of the Akatsuki were stoic and silent, while this boy was outgoing and cheerful. Well, some of the Akatsuki were stoic and silent.

Deidara was currently molding clay into various shapes, while his partner, Sasori, was sitting by him working on _something_. Though what, he could never tell. Kakuzu was counting money while Hidan was trying to convert Itachi and Kisame to Jashinism. Konan was busy fixing dinner for them, as it had been found that none of the others could cook worth a flip. This was found after many explosions, finding hot dogs floating in jell-o and finding human body parts in the food.

Just then the kid with the orange swirly mask came into the room (was he skipping?), making a beeline to Deidara. Unsure of what to think, he looked at the kid as he approached.

"Would you like to come to my room? I want to show you something," Tobi told the blond. Deidara had no idea what to say. He wasn't thinking Tobi would do anything bad, but what would he want to do?

So, being the nice terrorist of the Akatsuki, he said, "Sure," and followed the boy to his room.

There was silence in the room for about five seconds after.

Then Kisame says, "I think five."

"No, surely ten, at least," came from Hidan, taking a rest from trying at being a missionary. At that moment the leader walked in.

"I say thirty. He's nicer than you all were," he told them, leaning at the door into the room. At that moment everyone looked at Kakuzu.

"No, I hate it when you bet. It always leaves me with less money," he told them.

"That's cause you suck at gambling," his partner told him. Kakuzu glared at him. From the kitchen, Konan rolled her eyes.

"If you're going to argue, go to another room," she told them while dicing some vegetables.

"Shut the hell up, woman," Hidan answered.

"I will come in there,"

"Is that supposed to scare me?"

"Break it up, both of you," the leader, Pein, said to them. Hidan snorted and turned back to Itachi, who had fallen asleep, and Kisame, who was trying to work out a bet with Kakuzu. In the kitchen, Konan slipped something into Hidan's portion of food, as she always did when he ticked her off. It was very effective.

"We all know you would side with her anyway," Hidan muttered, then had to duck suddenly as a kunai came flying out of the darkness, almost hitting Itachi behind him, who also ducked. The kunai got stuck in the wall behind them.

"Wow, that was a wimpy shot,"Hidan said to the darkness. Then came the kunai from behind, hitting him in the butt. Hidan fell over, sighing.

...

"Now, shall prince Tobi rescue the princess?"

"No."

"Deidara-sempai!"

"Fine. Oh yes, please save me," Deidara answered in a monotone. It was two hours after the dreaded choice to go into Tobi's room, and now he knew why he had heard someone snicker when he had left the room. He had tried to escape nicely several times, but the kid was wearing on his patience now. He was trying to figure out the most painful bombing technique he knew that wasn't a suicide technique.

"Oh, fine princess, Tobi shall come to your rescue!"

"That's what I'm worried about," Deidara commented under his breath. He was currently on the ceiling, wearing a big pink dress that was sleeveless. It was covered in fake jewels, and seeing as it was being worn on a guy, looked odd. Tobi had a kind of tower built into his room, which he was now standing on, with Tobi standing on the ground below. Too bad he didn't have his bag of clay, as he had had to take it off.

...

"OK, it's a good thing that we didn't bet, as he still isn't out," commented Kisame.

"You know, I think I actually feel sorry for the guy. No wait, that would be the indigestion from the food earlier," Hidan stated, then glared at Konan once more, who didn't say anything, knowing she had won for now.

Everyone was silent again, for no one knew what to say. Too bad silence is not something that there is a lot of in the Akatsuki hideout.

At about that moment, many things happened one after the other. The first was that everyone in the room (along with many people not in the room) heard an explosion. Not just a wimpy one either. One that rattled everyone's bones. Wall bits came flying from the direction of Tobi's room, along with Deidara running as fast as he could in a half blown apart pink dress covered in ribbons and fake jewels. He was running so fast that he couldn't stop when a wall came up. He ran straight into it. He fell to the floor, still conscious, but now sporting a bump on his forehead. He sat there for a second. Then he got up and and headed for his room. Tobi came into the room after, with his mask still in place somehow. He slumped, then turned and headed back into his room.

And then there was silence again.

...

The blond nin had just finished cleaning up and getting dressed. He was laying on his bed, wishing he had just said no to Tobi. There was a knock on the door, in which Deidara said to come in. In the doorway was his redheaded partner, just standing there.

"Are going to do something, or just stand there?" Deidara asked the puppet master. His partner walked into the room, then sat on the bed. He was silent for a second or two, and it was kind of uncomfortable.

"About today... sorry I didn't warn you. I thought it would be funny. It was, but..." Sasori told Deidara. Deidara sat there for a bit, before coming to a conclusion.

"Wait, you all knew what was going to happen?" Deidara asked him. Sasori nodded his head.

"Tobi always does that with new people. He invites them into his room, and get them to play dress up with him, or some version of it. There are always varying levels of response," the red head told him.

"Did he invite you into his room? I thought you were one of the older members," Deidara commented.

"Yes, he did invite me. He came after me, but that didn't matter. I went in, of course. I didn't know him well enough to think he would do that."

"What did you do?" Deidara asked Sasori.

"I was in there for thirty minutes. I finally managed to sneak away," Sasori answered, "what I did was less interesting than the others. Hidan was in there for two minutes, then started to cuss Tobi out and then he ran from the room. Itachi used the Mangekyo Sharingan on him, then slipped away. Kisame chased Tobi around the room with his sword. All were in the room for less than thirty minutes, much less two hours. You broke the record really," Sasori said. Deidara sat back a bit and thought about it. Then he laughed.

"So, I'm guessing that no one has ever went into Tobi's room twice?"

"Well, no. Wait, you aren't thinking about going back in there, are you?" Sasori asked.

"Hell no! I was just wondering," Deidara answered, "why would I want to anyway? I was wearing a pink dress when I ran out of there! I know you saw me. You were there." Sasori sat there, expressionless. Then, he smiled. For once. A real smile.

"I saw you. I pity the person who didn't see you,"Sasori commented.

...

Meanwhile, standing outside the door were Hidan, and Kisame. The door was cracked open enough that they could see them talking. Hidan was close to tears, he was trying so hard not to laugh. Kisame, on the other hand, wasn't trying so hard.

"Sasori! I've never seen you actually show emotions. That's so cute!" he snorted out, laughing. Hidan broke down and started laughing.

Deidara may have been new to the Akatsuki, but he wasn't daft.

"Leave us alone!" he yelled. Sasori cracked a smile.

"Leave it. If you really knew anything about the Akatsuki, you'd know that if you were to look into one of their rooms at night, you might or might not come across something along the lines of what they are teasing us for. Let's just say, Kisame and Hidan aren't as tough as they look," Sasori told his partner.

"I heard that!" Hidan yelled.

"Of course you did. You're not deaf, are you?"


End file.
